A personal journey from hectic to health

There is nothing worse than feeling the rush and overwhelm. I confess that I am a rusher, actually let me re-phrase that, I was. If you are someone who checks your phone while on the toilet because you think that’s an efficient use of your time, it is possible you are a rusher too.

I recently read Rushing Woman’s Syndrome by Dr Libby Weaver and it was an eye and heart opening read. Four years ago, I was diagnosed with Hashimoto’s and it has been an up and down journey reclaiming my health since then. I have read countless health books, and Dr Libby’s book was like an ‘a-ha’ moment I needed to help me understand what was going on in my body when I rushed.  I also felt deeply that I needed to let go of some emotional blockages and the negative beliefs about myself that I have been carrying for years. I needed to tell my brain, it is safe to heal, so my body could follow.

While I own and operate an organic food delivery company and have for 12 years, ashamedly I was making myself sick with the rush and pressure of trying to keep it all together, working like mad, managing a home and raising 3 busy boys. I knew I needed to delve into my need to rush. Now when I say rush, I don’t mean running around literally like crazy, it is more the internal panic of never feeling on top of it all, the never-ending to-do’s, driving over the speed limit, feeling scattered, forgetful and always thinking of what’s next. All the time looking calm as a cucumber on the outside!

I’ll briefly share a major thing that happened this year. My best friend passed away from a brain tumour. Every week for two years, myself and some close girlfriends would gather around her to be with her, encourage, cry, laugh and hold hands believing for her healing. In her final days in palliative care, I would sit by her bed and hold her hand and I’d stare at the pictures on the wall of her looking completely healthy with her arms around her husband and two sons. On the wall was a poster, something the nurses had put together, with what mattered most for her, it said, ‘Family & Friends’. I’d sit there, and those words would put everything abruptly put into perspective.

I share this because we all need to be reminded about how precious our body, mind, family, friends and planet is. Slowing down almost feels counter intuitive this day and age. I used to baulk that it was impossible, and I know many people (woman especially) feel trapped and unable to slow down. For years my caring concerned mother would say I needed to do this. I wanted to scream at her and tell her that it is impossible! (in fact, I probably did, sorry mum).

I understand that pockets of busyness are unavoidable, but ongoing rush is detrimental. These days I have a solid routine of self-care that helps me sustain those times. I freely take guilt free naps, say no or compromise when I need, I’m off the coffee and wine (sob), but I can still enjoy a sneaky Gin, Soda and Lime on my fortnightly date nights out with Scott. I routinely have a green smoothie or veggie juice each day and I meal plan and batch cook to ensure there is always good food around.

My work hours have reduced, but my productivity is better and financially we were prepared to take the cut for the sake of my health, our family and marriage. My exercise is currently yoga, swimming, sauna, walking and meditation. I have learned to live with mess and I have delegated and recruited all hands-on deck in the house. It is no longer ‘mums’ job’. All these small changes are making a difference to my clarity, energy, sleep, intimacy, anxiety levels and ability to be there for my family more.

If you resonate with any of this, please don’t let it be a sickness, death or accident to change you. Your health, vitality, dreams, future and relationships depend on it. I heard someone use the word ‘Craptastic’, that has been this year. This year has been the ‘great undoing’ and it is not easy or comfortable, sometimes scary, but the other side is amazing, and I would go through it all again.

So, what matters most to you? How do you want to see your healthiest version of yourself? Trust your inner voice and compass to show you where you rush and why. Find the vision for yourself and those travelling close with you. Trust me, if you start walking the talk, the Universe will open up new opportunities and support you.

And I forgot something, because it is easy to forget that gratitude, thankfulness and celebrating the small wins does amazing things, even when you don’t feel it.

On that note, thank you. I’m grateful you stopped to read this.

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